good enough for a mention, Wesley

This email conversation went down today:

me: There is this band thats been getting all this buzz called Vampire Weekend. Have you heard of them? I thought they'd be a little tougher with a name like that but they were sort of pussy and emo. You might like them.

Wes: I have to give credit where it is do...quite funny assface.

later...

Wes: vampire weekend sucks by the way. you were right about them, but wrong about me apparently.

Me: wow. i thought you would love them. i like their name, why do they suck so hard? They should give that name to someone else and call themselves like Fairy Puppy Wednesday or something.

Wes: congratulations, you just made me laugh out loud at work. its settled then, some day you and i are going to start a bad pulp dance-punk band named "fairy puppy wednesday" i can't wait.


Don't anyone steal that band name. Unless, it's Vampire Weekend. Then you can have it...we can trade.

I don't have to fake like I like Superbowl Sunday anymore!!!

It was a weekend for celebrity sightings. I had to go to Union Square yesterday to get some foot covers at Paragon so I thought I'd walk through the farmer's market and get an apple. I turn around and there's Helena Christensen with her friend and their kids. She is way tall and skinny but all over small. She has like a small head or something.

Then today I rode 50+ miles with some friends. To Nyack and back. We did River Road and the hill. Of course Joe makes us ride to the complete bottom when we were already half up it to get the full effect and "not cheat." It wasn't as steep as it was long. Those damn state line hills are still killing me but I will master those fuckers. I wasn't as embarrassed this time riding with them. They like to not tell me what's ahead so they can laugh at me. We went down some screaming ass downhill and I couldn't make the sharp left and had to keep going and then ride back up while they wait for me. Awesome. But it was fun. They are fun guys and good company for hours on the road.

I get home and I'm standing outsided my building with my bike and I look up and it's Frances O'Connor from Cashmere Mafia. Yay, second celeb sighting in 2 days.


I ran inside, took the fastest shower ever and went to Mozzarelli's on 23rd and Madison. They were having a gluten free day. Gluten free pizza is good on any day. But finish a long hard ride and gf pizzza is like food from the Garden of Eden. I wanted to cry. I got a piece of BBQ chicken pizza and a piece with baked ziti on it. YES, BAKED ZITI. Amazing! Then I got some donut holes that were hot and a piece of cheesecake. When it comes to gf food, I don't hold back.

i get it tri gods...

Over training + cutting back on food = depleted immune system, insane upper respiratory infection and flu and not being able to race my first race of the season. I get it. I fucked up. Lesson learned.

Worst weekend in a long time. It's no fun to be so sick that I had to get medicine delivered because I literally couldn't walk down the stairs to get it myself. Way too much TV and alone time stuck in this apartment is not good for the mind. I'm so mad that I missed the first of the Grand Prix half marathons. I worked my ass off for that damn race.

I'll take a few more days off and hopefully be back in the pool by Wednesday.

even on my death bed

I still spot the celebs...
It's the dude from Weeds and 40 Year Old Virgin, Romany Malco.
23rd and 7th last night on my way to the Urgent Care place.

gross

There is not a person in the world that I trust enough to ride one of these death traps with. I hate them. Grow a pair and ride alone!

queen of unsolicited advice

Actually people ask me for workout tips all the time. I'm by no means an expert on workouts or diets (I don't ever diet). But I have been spending more time in the gym than usual lately because of the cold ass weather and yesterday I was thinking about what I think everyone does wrong. Here's my list of shit NOT to do:

• Don't hold to on the treadmill/stairmaster whatever, don't touch it. Hold on to the elliptical hand things, but really engage when you use them.
  
• If you can read a book or magazine while you are working out, you are not working hard enough
• Don't drink a smoothie from the juice bar after you work out. WTF? Those things are more calories than you've burned. I promise. Even if the machine says you burned 600 calories. You didn't. And the smoothie is 700.
  
• Don't drink calories in any form, other than coffee. Unless you are an endurance athlete, you don't need gatorade at the gym. Coffee is essential to life though. But don't fool your self at Starbucks, a venti skim latte is over 200 calories. That's more than 20 minutes on one of those machines. Get a venti coffee with some milk and splenda. Drink water/tea the rest of the time.
  
• Do the elliptical at at least a level 10. Level 3 or 4, you might as well go home and clean the kitchen floor. You'll have burned the same amount of calories. I'm not a fan of the elliptical machine. Spin classes and treadmill are the best.
  
• Don't be intimidated by spin classes or any class at the gym. A spin class is a calorie torcher if you really work hard in them. Boot camp classes and total body classes are also awesome.
  
• Don't worry about what other people are doing at the gym, or wearing, or reading. Don't look at other people. Do you own thing and get out. Standing around and talking, you aren't working out and I bet you added that time to yourself. Run on the treadmill for 20 minutes and talk for 30, I bet you went home and said you worked out for an hour. You didn't!
  
• Work your core with a medicine ball and do your sit ups on a yoga ball. Work your core every time you go.
  
• Eat something before you go to the gym. (Like my Quinoa breakfast of champions!) Drink water at the gym.

I have tons more random things that I will rant and rave about the gym. But the bottom line is, work hard at the gym. Be in the moment and be aware. If you go there and go through the motions, it's pointless. The gym is always a last resort for me. I would rather ride my bike outside, run outside and swim than go to the gym. The treadmill makes me feel like a hamster, I hate the elliptical and if you get a shitty spin teacher, then it sucks.

Now, I'm off to the gym because it's cold out and I'm a pussy and don't feel like running and freezing at the track.

breakfast of champions

I eat this everyday. I make one cup of uncooked quinoa with 2 cups of water. It makes 4 servings of quinoa. I add a small handful of mixed, unsalted nuts (chopped up), some dried cranberries, dried raisins, a dash of cinnamon, a tiny bit of milk and a little less than a tablespoon of the Splenda Brown Sugar blend. I keep the pre-made quinoa in the fridge so I heat it up the whole bowl with all the toppings in it. The milk makes it less dry. Quinoa is a high protein grain, its gluten free and it satisfying in the morning.